Friday, May 05, 2006
the 100th post
The past few days have been kind to me, despite a bad trip (not literal) I had on Sunday.. Yea.. That's the real reason why I can't go out much this hols.. Got into my parents bad books last Sun and had to spend the rest of this lifetime (and the next) sucking up.. Doing housework being at home all the schitz. YES.. I do do some housework ok.. Some. HAHAHA..Anw, I just started reading this book "Fearless Relationships: Simple Rules for Lifelong Contentment" and one of the rules that made an impression was
"Be kind no matter what."The author, Karen Casey, narrated an excerpt she got off another book in the 70's by John Powell. Every morning Powell and his friend would be walking down a New York City street and would stop to buy a newspaper from a street corner vendor. And every morning this vendor would be very rude towards his friend, still, all the same, the friend would treat the vendor very kindly and even tip him . Believing that the vendor probably deserved a rebuff instead, Powell asked his friend on why he was always being so kind. His friend answered,
"Why should I let him decide what kind of a day I am going to have?"There so many times when we are faced with unpleasant pple or circumstances that can really make our blood 'go upstairs' and more often than not, we'd get frustrated and react in a similarly unpleasant manner. And for the rest of the day or even some days afterwards we'd not be able to escape that horrid feeling from the encounter. This, Casey described, is like being "held hostage.. by other people's behaviour."
I know this feeling. In fact recently I was just recounting about how horrid I felt when I was confronted by a very unpleasant being who frustrated me so much I broke down. And for sometime afterwards I let that dictate how I was going to behave towards him (coldly) and naturally our (inevitable) interactions weren't as effective. Upon reflection, I realised that what I did really did not help matters. Even if a kind response isn't forthcoming, Casey added, the next best thing would be to walk away.
Walking away does not necessarily show defeat. In fact, in certain circumstances, it does reflect your strength, if nothing else, in self-control.
As Dalai Lama once said, "Your assignment in this life is to love one another. And if you can't love one another,
at least don't hurt one another." :)
Yup yup.. Here are some points that may help in keeping kindness in mind...
- Pause a moment before answering a question. And in that moment, remember kindness.
- Being kind does not mean agreeing with the other person.
- Being kind is using a soft voice, a smile, an acknowledgement, and not using hurtful words.
- Kindness can be practised until it becomes real.
- Acting as if we feel kind is just as good as feeling kind to begin with.
- Kindness isn't weakness.
So let us all strivvvvvvve to be kind k.. I know for some pple, it would take like some major effort *cough-katak-cough*, but insya Allah, we can do it! Remember, the point is to not let the other person decide what kinda day YOU are gonna have.. And to be kind no matter what.
As for that 'being' I mentioned, I'm trying to focus on his 'good' and forget the 'other other' stuffs. Oh yea! My mum also pesan-ed to me to always doa for Allah to lembutkan hati orang yang kita sedang berurusan dengan, semoga urusan kita dilancarkan.. (err.. My malay-to-english translations sucks, but it roughly means when dealing with another person, we pray that God will soften the heart of that person so that our dealings with him will be smoother.. Haha.. What did I say abt my translations..) I think just the simple act of making that doa will make us feel better already.. :) :)
Ok lar.. It's really past 3, and I have to wake up early tmr (later) because of my date with THE GIRLS (zahzah fifi mimi daisy happyily and baba (i cant end with an 'i'-sound for that!)) to take the Tree Top Trail at macritchie! Haa.. The things we do when we're bored.
And before I go, here are some snapshots of the Macho Man *trumpet blows* !! Haa.. Looking not so macho, unfortunately. Try to spot the pic in which he was holding the straw so daintily!
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Spot it? It's the 3rd pic from the left in the top strip.
Oh see the 3 pics in which he was looking at my phone abashed? Haa.. What he was watching is a vid of him LIP-SYNCHING to Seroja. Mawi AND Siti. Funny shits. Hahaa.. Sorry macho man. I have to save the world from their delusion abt you.. ;)
iFLEW @ 2:01:00 am
to the now
(click for a larger view)